She Rocks the Spectrum
A Therapy Center for Autistic Girls & Women
Welcome!
I'm Rachel Wheeler
I’m an autistic woman who went undiagnosed for decades. I masked so well that even I didn’t realize how much I was hiding. I succeeded on the outside—high-achieving, responsible, composed—but internally, I was exhausted. Constantly overwhelmed by social expectations, sensory overload, and emotional dysregulation I didn’t know how to name. It wasn’t until adulthood, through the lens of parenting my neurodivergent daughter, that the pieces finally fit. Watching her move through the world—unmasked, unfiltered, beautifully herself—showed me what I had been missing my whole life: permission to be me. I’m not just trained in neurodiversity—I’ve lived every chapter of it. And now, I work with women like me. Women who are tired of performing. Women who are brilliant, burned out, and ready to find their way back to themselves.
A Therapist for Women Who’ve Always Felt “Too Much” or “Not Enough”
If you’ve spent a lifetime trying to fit in, only to feel like you don’t belong anywhere—therapy with me might feel different. I work with autistic women who: - Were diagnosed late—or are wondering if they might be autistic - Struggle with masking, burnout, or internalized self-blame - Feel emotionally overwhelmed, misunderstood, or disconnected - Have spent years caring for others and are finally ready to care for themselves Therapy isn’t about fixing you. It’s about unmasking safely. It’s about making sense of your story. It’s about coming home to who you’ve always been.
Autistic. ADHD. PDA. And Building a Life That Works.
I’m autistic. I have ADHD. I also have a PDA profile—Pervasive Drive for Autonomy—which means I have an intense nervous system response to control and expectations. These identities shape every part of how I live, parent, and love. They’ve taught me to build a life around my nervous system, not against it. They’ve helped me understand what safety actually feels like. And they’ve given me a fierce compassion for clients navigating similar terrain. I don’t offer surface-level tools. I offer deep, honest, sustainable work grounded in lived experience.
Parenting While Neurodivergent
I’m raising a neurodivergent child as a neurodivergent mom. That means I understand the daily negotiations of energy, the sensory overload of parenting, and the grief that sometimes comes with letting go of conventional milestones. I support other neurodivergent moms who are: - Managing meltdowns, shutdowns, and school struggles - Struggling to find support that actually works - Trying to parent without losing themselves in the process There’s no perfect script for parenting—but there is a path that centers your capacity, your child’s needs, and your right to show up authentically.
Relationships from the Inside Out
Before I understood my neurotype, marriage was a puzzle I couldn’t solve. My husband and I spent years missing each other’s signals. What looked like distance was often overstimulation. What looked like detachment was actually shutdown. Getting diagnosed gave me language. It gave our relationship clarity and compassion. We stopped trying to perform “normal” and started building something that fit us. I now help other couples—especially those where one or both partners are autistic—move out of blame and into understanding. Together, we untangle communication patterns, create meaningful accommodations, and build relationships that honor both people.
The High Cost of Masking
Masking helped me survive. But it also cost me intimacy, joy, and self-trust. Now, I work with clients who are ready to stop living from a place of fear and start living from a place of truth. We explore: - What masking has protected you from—and what it’s taken from you - How to set boundaries without guilt - What it means to reclaim your voice, your needs, your pace You don’t have to unmask recklessly. There’s a way to do it with thoughtfulness, safety, and care.
A Brush with Mortality—and a Shift in Purpose
Years ago, I had a near-death experience. It wasn’t terrifying—it was clarifying. It stripped away the noise and reminded me what matters: presence, connection, meaning. I carry that clarity into every session. Especially with women who feel like they’re running out of time. The time to matter. The time to feel seen. The time to finally live.