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Love List

Tell your partner — specifically — what makes you feel loved.

Most couples assume their partner already knows how to make them feel loved. Most are wrong. This worksheet replaces the guessing with a list — at least twenty specific, actionable things — that your partner can actually do.

The rules

  • Think of what makes YOU feel loved — not your partner's shortcomings.
  • Be specific and actionable — 'be more affectionate' isn't useful.
  • List at least 20 — don't stop before 20.
  • Star items already happening that you want to continue.
  • Read the list to your partner using Reflective Listening — don't just hand it over.

Some examples: …you reach for my hand when we walk. …you send me a sweet text mid-day. …you drop everything and hug me when I come home. …you thank me for making dinner. …you run your hand through my hair. …you walk around the block with me after dinner.


Step 1 — Write your list

Don't stop until you have 20. Be specific. Star (★) the items already happening that you want to continue.

01. I feel loved when…
______________________________________________

02.
______________________________________________

03.
______________________________________________

04.
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05.
______________________________________________

06.
______________________________________________

07.
______________________________________________

08.
______________________________________________

09.
______________________________________________

10.
______________________________________________

11.
______________________________________________

12.
______________________________________________

13.
______________________________________________

14.
______________________________________________

15.
______________________________________________

16.
______________________________________________

17.
______________________________________________

18.
______________________________________________

19.
______________________________________________

20.
______________________________________________


Step 2 — Share it together

  • Read it together — don't just hand it over. Take turns reading aloud a few items at a time. Use Reflective Listening: 'What I'm hearing is ___. Is that right?'
  • Don't try to react to everything at once. A few items per session is plenty.
  • Tape your partner's list to the bathroom mirror. Read it every morning. Pick one thing from their list to do that day.
  • Don't be defensive. If their list contains things you haven't been doing — that's information, not an indictment.
  • Update every three months. What feels loving in winter doesn't always feel loving in summer.
Cassie Clayton

Cassie Clayton

Client Care Coordinator

Welcome!

I'm Cassie Clayton, Client Care Coordinator.

If you have questions about getting started, I'm here to help!

​Schedule a time to chat with me below or free to reach out via call, text, or email:

​​Email : clientcare@newpathfamily.com

Text or Call: (408) 475-2746‬

I hope to hear from you soon, 

 

Cassie

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